Crazy teacher dreams

My typical crazy teacher dream (which I dreamed again four nights ago) involves being in a classroom and students are ignoring me. I have no control. Usually an administrator is watching this happen, and I am feeling humiliated and small. 

One of my closest work colleagues/friend is leaving to have her baby, and her absence must be affecting me more deeply than I thought.

Last night, I had the craziest, sort-of teacher dream ever, and awoke sweaty with a pounding heart. Thought I would share this dream with you just for your reading pleasure.

The dream begins with me visiting my ex-mother-in-law and discussing her health problems. She has something wrong with her hip and she is undergoing some sort of treatment. My pregnant teacher friend suddenly appears in my ex-mother-in-law's basement with us, and she says, "Terri, help me. Something is happening. I don't know what to do."

I'm thinking, "Hell, I don't know either," and I reach up to the rotary dial wall phone, and insert my finger in the holes and slowly, very slowly, dial 911. When the person picks up on the other end, it sounds like a party is occurring in the 911 call room. I yell, "PLEASE SEND AN AMBULANCE. MY FRIEND IS HAVING A BABY." Some muffled response is given that I can't comprehend. Suddenly, my grown college-aged sons and their best friend are talking loudly near me, and I scream at them to be quiet. I begin yelling in the phone again, while my friend informs me her water has broken. Now, I'm scared to death. I tell her, "I'm just going to drive you to the hospital," but I'm so worried something will happen on the way, and she will hate me forever. 

As we start walking to the car, the ambulance arrives and a gang of Hispanic teenage boys jump out of the ambulance. They are so happy and chatty like they are attending a social event. We all get in the ambulance, and while one attendant is seeing to my friend, the other boys are talking about their personal lives. I give them my best stern teacher look, and lecture them saying, "It is not very professional to talk about your personal lives while you should be treating my friend. You should know better. If you are going to work, then do your best. Be professional." They, of course, give me the teenage "God, when is this woman going to stop talking to me" look. 

My friend has now fallen asleep on the gurney, and the attendant informs me her blood pressure has dropped. I scream, "Get it back up." 

My friend sits straight up, and angrily says, "Dang it, Terri. I was sleeping so good." (In real-life, she would have replaced "good" with "well" because she is an awesome English teacher.)

We arrive at the hospital, which looks like the Atlantis Resort in the Bahamas. 
Suddenly, a nurse jumps in the ambulance to check on my friend, and when she steps back out, she throws me a hospital gown and suggests, "You might want to put this on." Apparently, I have been topless the whole time. As I fiddle with the hospital gown, they rush my friend into the emergency entrance. 

I start to enter the hospital, but can't seem to find the entrance. I start running all around, and finally find a door to a stairwell. I'm trying to climb the stairs, but giant beach balls are blocking the way. It's like I'm in some type of obstacle course for a T.V. show. I climb over the balls and go out onto a fire escape, and as I start sliding down the fire escape, a Jamaican man joyously yells down at me very Jamaicanly, "Your friend has given birth to a little girl, mon." This surprises me because my friend is having a boy. (I think the man is Jamaican because I have another teacher friend who is Jamaican, and I had talked with her quite a bit earlier in the day.) 

Anyway, I jump down onto the beach from the fire escape and run to the other side of the building still trying to find an entrance. Suddenly, I awoke. 

That was the weirdest teacher dream ever, and I obviously have some separation anxiety issues with my friend's maternity leave. 

Wishing her a quick and easy birth to beautiful baby Everett.


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